I just thought I’d write to thank you for letting me down once again. I know there have been times when I haven’t been so nice to you. I’ve partied a little too hard on occasions, have indulged in takeaways, and perhaps haven’t exercised quite as much as I should have but I like to think things are generally ok between us. We’re somewhat fit (we DO exercise!), our BMI is normal, and on the whole we’ve been eating healthily so why the constant vendetta against me? Maybe you think I’ve done something really bad in my life that you need to punish me for but honestly I don’t think there’s anything that I’ve done to deserve this. I get that you like to throw tantrums but really, isn’t two and a bit years enough? This latest stunt has cost us over ten grand, not to mention the week-by-week costs incurred over the last two years. Was acupuncture really that bad? If you could sort your shit out and stop all this nonsense it would be much appreciated.
Let me know if there’s anything else I can do to rectify the wrongs between us. You know, if you just behaved and accepted a baby then all these needles and procedures would cease. OK, I know they’d be replaced by other procedures but they’d be for a limited amount of time. Would it really be that bad? Just have a think over what I’ve said and let me know if there’s any possibility that we could get on in the future.